L'repudiatus

Dearest rain, please drown my self-pitiness
No matter how much I wanted, it won't leave me
I tear away my wings and every trace of immaculacy but persists still the heaviness in the chest
I wish for it so much my hands bleed when I clasp them together to offer my prayers

Send all thoughts to the sky and let them rain down on me
To enable me to unbind myself from the tormenting past of wrongdoings
Ah what is this?
It's REGRET

Come, I don't want to be like this
My sincerest plea for the rain to cleanse me
Is my voice so frail it fails to reach you?
Please do not forsake me after leaving
I choke on my own tears, and the healing wounds reopen
Have my sufferings evoke anything from you?
I offer them as sacrifice

A shining light, at far distance
I outstretch my arms to gain hold of it

Dearest rain, I am awaiting for your arrival
While reliving the sinful past that buried me neck-deep I realise that,
"Never once did I appease you..."

My empty heart grieves as I fail to reach you out
And this place, hallowed and consecrated shall be where I sleep
If you won't even turn back then just leave signs that I am forgiven already
Just a single sigh...

My prayers are ignored, my fingers bleeding
While my wishes, fragile like sand, are being scattered in the wind
I am alone, lonely without you

Dearest rain, sadness, please take it away
With every bead of water running along my scabbing body
I am sure I am rejuvenated
I collected them in my cupped hands and watch helplessly as they seep away through the cracks of my finger

A blinding light, at far distance
I won't be able to be comforted by it

「天の砂」La voix silencieuse: REDISCOVERY

Let me rest here
A place to return to

The space which aches in the absence of you...

The silence is hurting me
The beads fall again and again but they are left unseen

As I whisper "GOODNIGHT" the flashing light beacons
Luring me away from the sleep
Depriving me the comfort of dreams

"Waiting for you to fall by my side..."

The sanctuary sings but wounded not without remorse
Driven away, casted upon the sun
Crumbling away, unable to be rebuilt anymore

"Forgive me, I have sinned"
Tainted and impure, looking upon Eden, wishing for its light to reach down here

"Calling for you to fall by my side..."

I fall asleep, trapped within the lapis lazuli dream
Waiting to be released, but my voice remains unheard
Still, I touch the glass wall hoping to finally wake up

In this space, will I finally dissolve to nothingness?
Within you, sinking
Permeated by the aurora that merges the sky and the clouds

"Praying for you to fall by my side"

Shivering, longing for the fall
The beads roll away
No answer... Silence...
The conscience is nearly betrayed

In the end, the sanctuary is out of reach

"Having faith for you to finally fall by my side..."

「罪」

The way they reacted upon hearing my answer...

It is clear that what I have done is a sin.

Shouldn't have committed that...

Forgive me...

Quasi una fantasia

I wonder why I can't sleep right now?

"Calling for you to fall by my side..."

Yesterday, which had passed only less than two hours ago, had been dream-like.

I managed to taste the Flowerbuds. The Sacred Flowerbuds that offer comfort to those lucky to earn them.

It almost felt like a fantasy, how yesterday drifted past me. I was in a state of blank mind as I cruised along the painful hours of longing.

Also, the Voice of the Sanctuary managed to reach me before midnight.

I am currently basking myself in the beautiful melodies and the heavenly voice.

It feels comfortable.

But I still miss You.

鳥

The previous canary has come home to roost.

I am sorry but the space you left within me...

It has been occupied by a beautiful rose.

Ask for forgiveness if you want. I've told you, "once wounded it will take a very long time to heal" didn't I?

For you had discarded me away after I was of no use to you anymore.

Go find another cage, canary. There is no more place for you to return in me.

Leave us alone in our own world...

「鳥かご」-Joie foncée, Lucem Ferre-

Swallowed by the times of drifting in the everlasting dream
The shards of my raison d'etre are piercing through my chest

The sky starts to shine, therefore spread your wings of prayers and reach for the noctilucent cloud

How many times have I lost count of the times when the Sun's ray burn on me?
I don't remember, I gaze at the scars that remind me of the mistakes I've done

Why is it so hard to let go of you but you tend to leave me before it dawns
Is the sky filled with so much calamity that you refused to remain at my side?
Answer me, have faith in me, I'm damaged beyond repair

White rays begin to pierce through the cloud, outshining the noctilucent cloud
Yet I still cannot see beyond my two arms

If achieving what we desired is a sin I wouldn't mind to scrape away my grace if it means you staying with me forever
Because in you I find my true self
A genuine smile is carved on my face when I succumb to the endless desire

I shall take my leave, as the scorching rays penetrated the thick cloud covers and the mist dissipates
The dark depletes when agony eats me
I wrap my wings around me awaiting the next dawn

The Broken Plug

In the tomorrow that is drenched with tears to ease the pain of yesterday
You render your heart and calm it down with a gentle whisper

Keep spinning and trapped in the inpure cycle to achieve a greater good
You sacrificed many just for a tiny light
But I should ask, is it worth it all?

In the dawning sky where you have shouted all that is left in yesterday's ruin
You wonder if they will ever fall and rain down on you once more

Managing to smile when your heart's scars are aching
The pain that you tried to hide but it is reflected in your eyes
As you refused to offer your hands to anyone

Grabbing hold of the fragile promises and hoping they wouldn't break
All the while knowing they will, someday
That is the reason for yesterday's tears, isn't it?
Heading to a direction where the dent on your emotions doesn't show

In the tomorrow where you will act as if nothing had happened yesterday
You gaze longingly into the sky where you have cried everything