L'repudiatus

Dearest rain, please drown my self-pitiness
No matter how much I wanted, it won't leave me
I tear away my wings and every trace of immaculacy but persists still the heaviness in the chest
I wish for it so much my hands bleed when I clasp them together to offer my prayers

Send all thoughts to the sky and let them rain down on me
To enable me to unbind myself from the tormenting past of wrongdoings
Ah what is this?
It's REGRET

Come, I don't want to be like this
My sincerest plea for the rain to cleanse me
Is my voice so frail it fails to reach you?
Please do not forsake me after leaving
I choke on my own tears, and the healing wounds reopen
Have my sufferings evoke anything from you?
I offer them as sacrifice

A shining light, at far distance
I outstretch my arms to gain hold of it

Dearest rain, I am awaiting for your arrival
While reliving the sinful past that buried me neck-deep I realise that,
"Never once did I appease you..."

My empty heart grieves as I fail to reach you out
And this place, hallowed and consecrated shall be where I sleep
If you won't even turn back then just leave signs that I am forgiven already
Just a single sigh...

My prayers are ignored, my fingers bleeding
While my wishes, fragile like sand, are being scattered in the wind
I am alone, lonely without you

Dearest rain, sadness, please take it away
With every bead of water running along my scabbing body
I am sure I am rejuvenated
I collected them in my cupped hands and watch helplessly as they seep away through the cracks of my finger

A blinding light, at far distance
I won't be able to be comforted by it