久々津

I saw in the dream that you were flying in the sky, not wanting to touch the ground anymore. Outstretching your hands, you tried to lift me up and whisk me away from my burdens.

I was floating, and fell back to the ground. Nothing left to do but watch you go across the horizon and disappear.

I see many headless female mannequins, lying on the barren soil sprawled. I go to look for the heads but they are all the same. They carry the same faces and each mannequin is begging me to find their own heads and re-attach them correctly. The sky is red, and there is no sun. Still, the light is bright enough to aid me in my search.

A glimmer of blue light caught my eyes in the distance and I immediately assume that it was from a pool of clear water. Sure enough, I am correct. However, deep underneath the pool is another mannequin, not moving and resting in a fetal position. This one is complete; she isn't missing anything. Her expression peaceful, and her tiny wrists are free of scars. The skin is translucent, and devoid of any deformities.

Intrigued, I dive deep and go straight to her. Standing on the edge, the distance from the surface and her seems so little but I must have been diving for a long time. I am able to breath underwater, or so I believe. She is still there, and I am curious why is she there. I need to see her, to learn of her story and past.

'I live here in this place. I am being fed shit and malnourished. I sleep to escape the situation and is perpetually dreaming. Please do not disturb me else I will be broken.'

'Please leave me alone. I can't be in another's presence. Forget that I am here and live on.'

I turn away and return back to the surface.

I want to live. I can live this out. I can breathe just fine, and I am not suffocating. I am free. I need to live. Even when the whole world is against me, I need to live, Hanging onto a single thread called hope, I can make this through.

I can live without you. I know. I want to believe it so. I will find a way.